Ugliest Camel Ever!!!

I am downloading some of the video from our trip and this is a video we took at the Kharkov zoo. This camel was a monster!

I know you are not supposed to feed animals but in Ukraine you are encouraged and expected to feed the animals otherwise they might not eat at all!

Fish story

A few weeks ago we went for our first time to our church's annual kid's fishing rodeo. We didn't think the kids would last the three hours from the first cast to the weigh in but at 9:00, nobody wanted to go home! For ten dollars total, we all ate, had a fantastic family outing and each of the kids took home an adult sized fishing pole for free!

The boys especially had fun and have been asking to go again. We took them this evening (Steve's idea) and had fun again. Would you like to see some of our pictures?


Vitali was pretty interested in the worms. Especially when it looked like they might be planning an escape!
Annette also enjoyed them. She has kind of sneaky grin here because she is getting ready to show Misha the worm that is in her hands.

Yes, he still freaks out about worms, apparently.Steve made him hold one. Misha always throws a fit before trying new things or even old things that he doesn't like but is proud of his accomplishments afterwards. See his dirty hand?

Steve, Vitali, and Misha peeking over, and through, the railing on the dock.

We did a lot of waiting....Watching our bobbers.... And replacing nibbled worms (Steve's department) .....I heard someone say once that fishing is called "fishing" for a reason. If it were easy, it would be called "catching".

We didn't catch anything.
Ivy and Annette started entertaining themselves by playing "house" with the little plastic lures in Daddy's tackle box.


Since our efforts were fruitless, we went over to Calhoun's, an on-the-water restaurant where people feed the fish below with starchy goodness left-overs from their plates. The carp that feed there are always lurking and are huge. This is one of those places where fishing can almost be called "catching".

After impressing the kids by reeling in a big carp, Steve helped Max pull one in too. Hannah also got to pull one in and they really enjoyed the challenge. Max posed proudly with his Dad so I could take a picture of his fish.
The kiddos are all tucked into bed and sleeping soundly and that is where I am heading too!

Thanks for sharing our fishing adventures with us!

Answering Questions on Fundraising for Adoption

We get a fair amount of email asking about fundraising for adoption. I often start to answer these and then got lost in day-to-day life and don't finish. I am going to try and answer more questions on a regular basis. I am also going to try and lose that 20 pounds I gained during the adoption. We will see how both of those work out!

I hope that those of you in the process of adopting get something from this.


Tips on Fundraising for adoption

#1 For us the process of adoption was a "spiritual" journey. I am not talking about the esoteric things you see on TV but of a knowledge so deep about what we needed to do. Our pastor has a saying "If you know your why, you can live with almost any how." We knew our "why" in such a concrete way that we were not going to let anything stand in the way; especially a lack of funds.

#2 When raising funds for adoption the "why" is very important. If the "why" is you this makes things very tough. Very few people want to help out white, middle income, American adults achieve a dream of adopting a child. However, if that "why" is a lonely, lost child in a vile orphanage in Eastern Europe that faces a near certain untimely and unseemly demise, many people will be moved to action. For us our "why" was about changing three young children's entire earthly and potentially their eternal destinies.

#3 People are not DONORS! We talked about what our objectives in pursuing adoption were with anybody who would listen. We did this not in a way that expected them to open their wallet but in a way that we hoped they might see the need of 150,000,000 lost children and be moved to do something to help at least one. For us that did not necessarily mean partnering with us but more of making them aware of how deep and wide this problem is. There were many people who partnered with us financially and others who did not and that was fine. There are many good and worthy causes that are deserving of support and it is essential to realize this.

#4 Car washes, lawn sales, card sales, etc are not necessarily the best means for raising large amounts of funds but they show people that you are serious about funding your adoption. The goal for us in these type of fundraisers was to share the "why." There is a saying "God helps those who help themselves," this is theologically inaccurate but people do tend to help people who help themselves.

#5 We were totally sold on the idea. We cut every bit of fat from our budget. I shopped our insurance, we started using a gas rebate card and paid it off every month but saved the rebate, etc, etc. We had already saved a fair amount of our own money for this endeavor. We changed our lifestyle and cut out most of the recreational activities like going out to eat, movies, etc. (not all, but most.) These things helped prove to those around us that we were serious about what we were doing.

#6 We used a regular website for fundraising and not a blog to share our main objectives and had a fundraising thermometer on the site. One of the most important fundraising tools was this prayer card. We had 1,000 printed up and gave them out freely. This card was very, very important to the successful funding of our sons' adoption.

#7 The greatest percentage of our fundraising monies were direct monetary contributions. We were given small to very large gifts from several individuals. When you are looking at a direct budget of ~$40,000 plus the cost of accommodating three more children and up to two months of lost income; the costs were staggering.

In the end, we had saved out of our own pockets enough to cover all the lost income, make the necessary improvements to our home, purchase a larger vehicle and pay for a significant amount of the adoption costs. Different family members, my customers, church members, friends and even strangers gave generously. Since we have been home others have given even more that has been used to help pay for medical expenses, etc.

As you can see the success in fundraising for our sons' adoption came from individuals who chose to invest in us as parents for three young children. I cannot stress this enough; fundraising for adoption is not a technique! Techniques are cheap and manipulative. Absolute genuineness is required for a successful fundraising effort. For us, the words of Martin Luther summed up our hearts desire best, "God help me, here I stand, I can do no other." There were no outs, we were "all in" and fully committed.

I hope some of these ideas might help.

Best Regards,

Steve

Misha Telling His Story of Fighting the Ukrainian Boogeyman!

By special request here is Misha telling his story about his fight with multiple Ukrainian Boogeymen.



Steve

Op-Ed by Steven Curtis Chapman

Here is an op-ed Steven Curtis Chapman wrote on adoption for CNN.

Here is the location of the original story

FRANKLIN, Tennessee (CNN) -- According to UNICEF, there are 143 million children in the world who have lost one or both parents.

In America alone, there are half a million children in foster care, and approximately 120,000 of these children are waiting to be adopted. In many countries, children are too often orphaned or abandoned because of poverty, disabilities and disease; every 15 seconds, a child loses a parent because of AIDS. These are staggering facts that can seem overwhelming and discouraging, but I believe that God has a loving plan for each child, and that plan is you and me.

Caring for these children is not the job of governments or institutions; instead, it is the job of families, people and communities. As Christians, our compassion is simply a response to the love that God has already shown us. Mother Teresa would constantly remind those who worked with her that the Bible clearly teaches that whatever we do for the least of these, we do for Jesus. So in a very real sense, caring for orphans is a chance to meet the person of Jesus in "the guise of human suffering." This is an invitation from the heart of God to know him and to experience his love.

Nine years ago, my wife and my eldest daughter, Emily, traveled to Haiti on a mission trip. Having been exposed to extreme poverty for the first time, Emily returned home with a determined passion to make a difference in the lives of at-risk children.

Only 12 years old, Emily went on an all-out campaign to persuade us to adopt. She bought a book on international adoption with her Christmas money and would read it to us regularly. She began fervently praying and writing letters to Mary Beth and me, encouraging us to consider giving a waiting child a home. Emily knew God was leading us in the direction of adoption; however, Mary Beth and I were not yet convinced.

My wife and I had always supported the idea of adoption, and as Christians, we understood the importance of loving and caring for others. But what I had not yet grasped was that adoption is a physical picture of what Jesus has done for me. I did nothing to deserve God's love; in fact, I was living as an orphan, without hope. Yet God chose to pursue a relationship with me, and through the death of his son Jesus, I was adopted into God's family.

My wife and I began moving toward adoption with fear and trembling and asking all the questions people ask. I remember Mary Beth crying herself to sleep at night saying, "What are we doing? I can't do this." However, God kept reassuring us that this was the direction he was leading us. It was a huge journey of faith for us.

In May of 2000, we found ourselves in a hotel room in China's Hunan province, welcoming the newest member of our family, Shaohannah Hope. From that moment, we began our journey into the world of adoption, orphan care and Shaohannah's Hope.

We went on to adopt Stevey Joy and Maria. Recently, our youngest daughter, Maria, passed from life on this earth and is now safely in the arms of Jesus. We have been completely overwhelmed by the love and support of so many during this time of deep, deep sadness. Through all that we've experienced, one thing we still know is true: God's heart is for the orphan.

In our travels to Latin America, Africa and Asia, we have visited many different orphanages. If you look past the surroundings and into the eyes of the children, they all have the same look. They seem to convey, "I don't think this is what I was made for. Where do I belong?"

These children are crying out for the hope of a family, for the hope of community, for the hope of a permanent love. Our mission, and the mission of our adoption charity, Shaohannah's Hope, is to show hope to these children and to mobilize people, families and communities to be living examples of God's love for them.

We started Shaohannah's Hope in order to connect willing families with waiting children, but the reality is that there are many orphans who cannot be adopted. Even though we may not be able to bring them into our homes, we still have the opportunity to show them the hope we have.

If only 7 percent of the 2 billion Christians in the world would care for a single orphan in distress, there would effectively be no more orphans. If everybody would be willing to simply do something to care for one of these precious treasures, I think we would be amazed by just how much we could change the world.

We can each do something, whether it is donating, adopting, fostering, mentoring, visiting orphans or supporting families that have taken in orphans. You can change the world for an orphan

A great Summer in the Water!

Our children have benefited from several of our friends and from our close proximity to the lake in that they have had loads of opportunities to swim! Shallow backyard pools to pools with deep ends and even those with diving boards, it doesn't matter to the kids! Water is water and there are a million ways to enjoy it!

We spent yesterday afternoon with some friends in the pool and I was reflecting back on where we started and how much has changed in six months since the boys have joined our family. from Misha and Vitali being terrified of bathtubs to Misha being unable to handle the stimulous of his first time in a swimming pool:
To this:
Our Friend Danny even gave Max and Misha a few little swimming lessons! Max managed to float a bit. Misha wasn't so hot at it but did really well diving and swimming with his face underwater.

Vitali had to take a nap for a while but when he woke up, he was ready to go!
Max has loved the water right from the start. He'll spend all day playing in the backyard in a foot of water! All boy!

Our first load of school books arrived today. The school year here starts next week. Hard to believe it, isn't it?!

How Misha tells a story!

This is how Misha tells a story. Just substitute "ootock" (Like this) and "backman" for batman, and replace the word mugger with "bobka yoshka" (villian)

Was He Real?

On Tuesday, Max, Misha and I attended the funeral of a 24 year old local soldier killed in combat in Afghanistan. Before we left I was talking with our children about this man and how he had died. This led to many different questions but the one that hit me hardest was this one; "Was he real?" This is a question I got from Annette, our 6-year old daughter.

It was with this question that I realized that in many ways the thousands of soldiers who preceded Corporal Hovater in death were in many ways "not real." They were simply headlines in the newspaper or a story on TV to me.

If you have never experienced the significance of a full honors military funeral please take the time to go.

The 22-year old widow sitting alone. The grieving mother. The snap of the guns in the 21-gun salute. The playing of taps. The presentation of the purple heart. The carefulness and respect of every movement by the honor guard. The shielding of the family by the Patriot Riders. The WWII, Korean, and Vietnam vets standing in solidarity. The precise folding of the flag. The finality of a "real" person who truly gave the last full measure of his devotion.

My boys asked so many questions and so many "whys." I wish I could have known Corporal Hovater in life but in death he taught both me and my sons incredible lessons on freedom, costs, and devotion. RIP in the arms of God!

Peace,

Steve

Surgery Update

(edited to include pictures)

Max, Misha, and Vitali all went into Children's West on Thursday for surgery:

We had been quite concerned because there is a two phase recovery process that is used. With the boys we just did not feel this was the most therapeutic method for them emotionally. The mind of a hurt child processes things differently. Even though they probably wouldn't remember much from phase 1 we asked that we be brought in because these boys already have enough things they won't remember that will haunt them for a very long time.

We are blessed to have Melissa's parents nearby so the girls stayed there Wednesday before surgery and Thursday after surgery. Coordinating two surgeons, five procedures, and three boys is a tough task but this was done smoothly by the staff. The boys were scheduled as the last patients of the day and we were able to be with them until they were wheeled into surgery and with them when they came out. With us having three groggy boys coming out of surgery we had Melissa's parents helping. The girls stayed with our friends Kathy Melquist and Heather McElhaney who were visiting from New York.

All went smoothly. Max had a horrific experience with dental work in Ukraine and we were very concerned about this. He ended up needing all eight childhood mollers pulled. He has parlayed that into 8 consecutive nightly visits by the tooth fairy. Misha, our little sensory guy, did quite well. Misha loves to sing, has great rhythm, can dance and now has a great set of grilles after ending up with 5 crowns. Vitali had to have a recurring issue dealt with and he has been suffering the most. In recovery he peed on me and then threw up on both of us.
(Click on the picture at right to see a "before" of Max's worst tooth. Warning: If you are especially sensitive, you won't want to look)


The boys are all doing quite well now. We have been so blessed and continue to be blessed. When we decided to start this journey we were not sure "how" we could do it. The amount of money we have spent this last year has been staggering and we have done it without going into a dime of debt. I continue to be amazed by the generosity of so many people. I had two people approach me recently and gave unsolicited generous gifts and then Friday of last week after I had sent a $2,800 check for the dental portion and was ready to spend another $2,000 on Thursday to cover our deductible. A third person through some incredible circumstances told us she was sending a very large check that was just enough to cover both of these expenses. We did not share this need with any of these people much less the amount.

Every time I begin to question or become concerned about something like this I am blown away. We have been home now six months. The last almost two years have been an incredible trip. If I was writing a script I couldn't have created the scenario that has unfolded. I feel like Isaiah when he said:

"In the year that king Uzziah died I saw also the LORD sitting upon a throne, high and lifted up, and his train filled the temple. Above it stood the seraphims: each one had six wings; with twain he covered his face, and with twain he covered his feet, and with twain he did fly. And one cried unto another, and said, Holy, holy, holy, is the LORD of hosts: the whole earth is full of his glory. And the posts of the door moved at the voice of him that cried, and the house was filled with smoke. Then said I, Woe is me! for I am undone; because I am a man of unclean lips, and I dwell in the midst of a people of unclean lips: for mine eyes have seen the King, the LORD of hosts."

I have always said this adoption was not about us and I can truly say it wasn't. That being said I have received so much from this journey. I understand life in a totally different light. I have seen the best and unfortunately the worst of humanity. I have learned to be much more empathetic.

Last week I got to experience another incredible thing. Little Vitali has a dimple. This might seem like nothing much but when we came home he was a scrawny and angry rage filled child. The last six months has been tough. Not as tough as we thought it might be but tough indeed. In reality that dimple was always there but it was hidden under the rage and malnourished body of our little boy. For me that little dimple is priceless!( If you look closely, you can see Vitali's barely-there
little dimple that is just newly appearing!)

Steve

That's an idea...

Steve told Max he'd give him some juice but first Max should
dump out the water left in his glass.

In all seriousness Max replied,
"Where? On Misha?"

Ivy wanted me to fall!

Not taking ownership when things happen seems to be a common theme for Vitali and Misha but this latest one was a classic.

Vitali had been standing on the recliner in our living room when he fell with a loud thud. Ivy rushed right over to help the wailing Vitali and was comforting him. When we asked Vitali what happened and how he fell, Vitali said "I was on that, and Ivy wanted me to fall, and I fell."

Funny thing is, when I want Vitali to behave, he doesn't.

Steve

A day at the Little River

...That's it's name. I just call it, "The Creek".

On Saturday we all hopped into the car and headed for The Creek. Everyone had a good time.


We found crayfish, caught some minnows, and the kids all had a blast riding down a channel someone had built of stones so that the water flowed through it a little deeper and quite fast. It looked fun and I wished it were deep enough for grown-ups!

Vitali and myself sat on the warm stones for a while so he cold warm up. He is so scrawny that he gets cold pretty quickly. (on a side note: we weighed him the other day and found that he has increased from 29 lbs when he first got here to 36 pounds. He's still really skinny so that should tell you something!)

Isn't he a little darling? I love this little guy!

You may remember Misha and his troubles with sensory issues. Those two words flow off my tongue so easily now that we have studied and worked hard to handle the strange behaviors and reactions that occur when you don't prcess sensory information in a healthy manner.

As I expected, Misha was worried about the creek. The bottom is covered with stones, the water is moving and chilly, there are visible fishlings swimming in it and water skaters zipping across its surface. Now, for those of you who don't know about this kind of thing, this next part may not sound very motherly to you.

Misha was worried but was tiptoeing along holding my hand. After a while I asked him what he was afraid of. "Slipping and falling into the water." he said. Not missing a beat I let go of his hand and gave him a gentle shove which sent his little life-jacket clad self into the two foot deep water. He popped right up and I smiled at him. "See?" I said. "It's ok to fall in! The water is fun!" He gave me a surprised look, smiled, let go and was off for a fantastic time. I never thought it would be so easy. He has improved so much!!

Here he is crawling into the channel to sail himself downstream for the hundredth time!
And here comes Max for another round. That's Steve behind him cooling his head. He was helping the little ones stop at the end of the channel so we didn't lose anyone further downstream!

The lovely Annette liked looking for crayfish. She never caught any, though. You kind of have to touch them for that. Unless you have a plastic cup, which we didn't. Look closely and you'll see she just lost one of her top teeth the day before !Ivy is our little dolly.

And here are all six, sitting a a fallen tree. Vitali was very nervous about the tree at first but then he realized he could handle it and decided he was pretty awesome to be sitting up so "high"!

Left to right are: Annette (6), Hannah (8), Vitali (4), Ivy (3), Misha (6), and Max (8).

Time to go!

Now, that was fun!

Melissa

In the Future...

...Anonymous comments will be deleted unless I like what you say--then I may keep them. If you sign your name and I still don't like what you have posted, I may still delete your comment. It is our blog, our children read it as does our family; I am all for a good discussion (really!) but an anonymous virtual tongue-lashing will get you nowhere but dumped.

Sorry for the negative nature of this post ! My last post drew two people who seem to think that children in orphanages would be better off there than in families that do not suit the opinions of these self-appointed "Orphan Police". I deleted one, the other is still there.

Melissa

Fathers Day for the father of six!

Father's Day is so much more exciting with six children!! The kids all piled on Daddy in bed the morning of the big day. They had been eagerly awaiting the moment to give dad his treasures for three days and when the moment it arrived, it was an explosion!

... Superman boxer shorts from Misha, a hose nozzle from Ivy, a bag of goodies from Hannah, water shoes from Annie, comic book character pajama pants from Max and my favorite--this appropriately-worded shirt from Vitali, who can't read but nevertheless managed to pick out the perfect gift to remind Dad specifically of him:

What is it about boys and things with wheels!

If anyone were to look at my front yard tonight, they would know that I didn't take any lawn-mowing pictures today! I took a bunch the other day, though. How could I resist? It was so funny!

We took our push-mower into the shop to get fixed and while it was there we asked about a rider. To make a long story short, Steve was quite the hero around here when it arrived! I mean, the boys were impressed that we had a push mower but now a riding mower? What could be more exciting?!

We live on about an acre of land and as Steve buzzed around the ever-shortening grass, Max was there, marching ten feet behind all the way.

The girls joined him once in a while:

But only Max stuck it out to the end!

He was barefoot and sweaty but as happy as could be!

And when it was done, everyone took turns going for a ride. Vitali practically shot off of the front step where he had been sitting while keeping a very close eye on the process! ( I am sure he would have walked the whole lawn too but we couldn't be sure he would stay behind the mower!)
What fun!!

Melissa

The Eimers' Six:

Aren't they looking spiffy, all dressed up before Steve's sister's wedding this past weekend?!

...and isn't this picture worth a thousand words?

An Eastern European Orphan Graduation

As we celebrate graduation time here in the US, I wanted to draw attention to the precarious position of Eastern European Orphans as they graduate. This video is compiled of pictures I took in Moldova, Ukraine and other pictures that are public domain.

I will warn you: Some of the pictures are extremely harsh and this video is not appropriate for children.

I was asked why I chose some of the pictures I did. The reason is because this is the reality these children face. We are uncomfortable viewing the HELL these children will be living, but at least for us it only lasts 2 minutes on a video!



Steve

Kagda ya big?

The boys are growing so quickly! At times I think they are not much bigger, although their maturity advances are unquestionable.

DAILY Vitali asks me, "Mama, Kagda ya big?" (Mama, when will I be big?) this is usually his waking thought when he snuggles in my bed and his nightly wish when I tuck him into his.

This little (shh, don't tell him I called him Little!) guy is so full of the life just bursting out of him that he is indescribable! He just can't possibly fit in all the living he wants to do each day. He gives it his best shot, though! He talks
all
the
time ...

...and when he is not talking, I can see him thinking (as he recharges) about how to be like the 'big' people in the house. He is so funny! Vitali breaks my heart each day at nap time, which always seems to come as such a devastating shock to him. The saddest tears emerge as his tiny shoulders slump and he heads for bed--reminds me of Tigger when he had to keep his promise to Rabbit not to bounce. In fact, he often makes me think of good ol' Tigger!

But this morning there was great joy in his tiny heart when he came in to report to me the good news. ( I'll tell you in a minute...if you don't guess first!)

The last couple of nights, Ivy has been our light-turner-offer at bedtime. She only recently has become tall enough to do this without a chair. It took every s t r e t c h y bit of effort but she could do it!

Vita could also turn it on. (This is a new accomplishment since he's been here but not the great cause for rejoicing this morning) Each night, however, when Ivy would turn off the light he couldn't make that last fraction-of-an-inch difference necessary to turn the light OFF himself! He tried; Oh!-- how he tried!

So the big news this morning? You have probably guessed it: Yep, the little man was beaming as he hop-skipped into my room in the early light, "MAMA! Ya off !" ( Mama, I off!) It took me a minute of bleary, sleepy-eyed blinking and Ivy filled in the translation for me, "Tawee turned the Yight OFF!"

He has been so happy all day, resting on his laurels. Oh, what fun to be four years old...I mean, what a thrill!

melissa

Boys...

We never used to give passing aircraft a second look...

No one in our family used to be able to be persuaded to eat vegetables for the promise of big muscles...
...but then that was before we had any brothers in the house!
Life is good--no, it's better--having boys, too.

M.