What the boys like to do on nice spring days...

Swing shirtless,

Practice muscle-showing,

Play Perch-the-Chick,
Practice not Freaking out over little baby chick pecks which, I can assure you,
do NOT hurt in the slightest.

Swing with a pretty girl--even if she is your sister,

Anything involving sticks. Here they are guns complete with sound effects.
(and just so you know that I am not a negligent parent,
I did tell Vitali not to chase people with sticks after making sure I got a good shot.),

"Picking" flowers (another stick activity),
See? Ivy got her flowers! Thank you, Vitali!

Pose nicely for your mom who is always waving that camera around,
Take the chick for a ride in the wagon and the dump truck at the same time...
I could go on and on. :-)

Simple matters of perspective...

We ate pizza in the car this evening while we were out doing this and that. I handed Misha's piece back to him and a moment later he complained, "Mama, My pizza is stuck!"

"Where?!" I asked him.

"Down there--" (pointing to the floor) "I did not drop it!" Was the reply.

"Well, How did it get there?"

Quickly came the reply, "It just fall down!"

"From where?" (can you tell I was suspicious?)

"My hand."

Oh. Well, at least he didn't drop it...


And then this one:

The boys were playing a game together when Misha came to me with a mournful wail, "Mamaaa, Max is cheater!" and then he proceeded to tell me more detail of Max's transgression. In the distance I could hear Max piping up, "Misha! You did it too!"

So I asked the poor puppy dog eyes and the wringing hands in front of me, "Misha, did you do it too?"

He tried to keep the soulful expression on his face but knew it was too late. "Yes." And with a sheepish grin he headed back happily to play with the others. I just put my head down and laughed!

Maybe you had to be there...

Melissa

Chicken experiment: Day 6

(Max is looking up to watch for hawks and eagles.)

I am very pleased with the difference we already see in Misha. I wish I could tell you more specifically what we see but it is such a slight shift that it would be difficult to explain. I am hoping that this brief encounter with 'parenting' will continue to be a good chance for us to teach compassion and concern for others.

Misha is doing a great job with his chick! Steve and I were in bed last night and we could hear Indiana Jones peeping loudly. (He has really turned up the volume now) Just then, Papa Misha called out from his dark bedroom, "Indiana Zhone, be quiet, go sleep!" Haha. Unruly children do need to be told to quiet down at bedtime, after all!

Misha often runs out to the kitchen or wherever I am to find me and report on Indiana. "My Chick is drinking a lot water!" "My Chick is eating food!" He doesn't bat an eyelash at cleaning out Chick's home, either.

The warm weather these last couple of days (which has disappeared today) meant Indiana could chase us around the yard. We were hoping Misha would be his favorite but he doesn't seem to care who runs past him, he'll just dash off after them, tiny wings at the ready and little orange legs doing their surprisingly speedy chicken dance across the lawn.

(Ivy, Max, and Indiana Jones--who is enjoying his flower bouquets immensely)
(See?)


(Ivy is offering Indiana a drink from her teacup. A moment after this picture was taken,
she turned around and said, "Oh no! All my tea is gone!")

His first day outside, Indiana ate a tiny worm, this meant that three more worms were dug up by eager volunteers and presented to Indiana. Another tiny victory here is that Misha surprised even himself by announcing that he is no longer afraid of worms! The second day outside, Indiana just wanted to run and run and run. So we did. Today, he went out for three minute sessions but at the third re-entry into the house his little chicken feet were shivering so I think it is just too cold!

I think Misha is making progress in some small ways. I see him mimic what Steve and I do with our children. For instance, the first night Indiana Jones was here, Steve prayed with the boys in their beds and then suggested that Misha should pray with his baby. Misha hurried out to the living room and knelt beside the box he had helped us prepare for Indiana and prayed with him. The next night, I tucked the boys in and prayed with them. Misha sat up as I was going out of the room and said, "Mama, I do not pray mine little chick!" I just told him that he could lay in his bed and pray for him tonight and that is what he did. But the next night, on his own, Misha made sure to pray with Indiana as soon as he got his PJ's on. He didn't want to miss out on that very important part of parenting. We take every opportunity to say things like, "that is good, Misha, babies like to be held and cuddled by their papas." or "What a good papa you are to check on your baby so often!" --and he does, too!

Tonight, Misha handed Indy to Steve before he went off to clean the box. Indy peeped a little. "Oh!" Misha deduced, "He afraid! It's okay little chick..." It is something to notice because he showed genuine concern and tried to evaluate the emotions of little Indiana. More progress.

Also, before we left for church last night, Vitali called to Misha, "Misha, let's go to the car!"
Misha looked very sternly at Vitali and scolded, "I was saying goodbye to my chick!"
And he had been for a while. I had heard him over there, not 'performing' for me to hear (I wasn't all that nearby), but just explaining to Indiana Jones about what he was going to do that evening: go to church, eat pizza, come home again...

Indiana was listening intently the whole time. I think he was taking notes. It's hard to tell because his writing looks like chicken scratch.

Melissa

PapaMisha

In an effort to develop a better sense of caring and compassion in our middle boy, Misha (7), we have gone and gotten him a little fluffy, delicate, high-maintenance pet.
A baby chick.
What could be cuter?

Misha has come so far from his early trips to our friend's farm where he would shrink in terror at the mere thought of holding anything living regardless of its fluffy cuteness. And, by the way, when I say, 'shrink in terror'? I mean it, okay?!

One thing Misha is much better at is self-control. By this I mean that, even though dogs no longer make him terrified but just simply very nervous, he hides it well. He may even pet the dog or comment on its adorableness but he would never do either of those things without an adult that he wants to impress present. He is the same way with people-babies, incidentally. (not afraid of people babies, though. Just weirded-out by them. He truly doesn't see what all the fuss is about!)

Anyway, because we want to teach him to not only be "un-scared" of animals and just "un-weirded-out" by babies, we had this idea that a baby chick might be just the thing to foster some independence and compassionate thinking in Misha.

Frankly, I don't care if he loves animals. I don't want him to hate them, though. I also want him to be comfortable with and even to truly enjoy babies and small children. This little exercise seems a great chance for us to talk directly about things with him and to train him individually in the area of caring for others less able than himself.

We let him pick the chick from our friends Tami and Chuck's chick brooder. It was newly hatched but fluffy. There were several different varieties but Misha had little interest and pointed quickly to a fluffy yellow little guy(or girl).

Chick and a bit of starter feed in hand, we thanked our friends and headed off to Walmart to get a clamp-light, a thermometer and a newspaper. In the car, Misha was holding the chick obediently and even with a nice artificial smile until I said to him, "hold your little chick closely, Misha, he needs to be warm. You are his papa now, you know."

Misha's eyes lit up a bit and he wriggled little Indiana Jones (that's is the chick's name) closer to his chest. Progress.

Indiana Jones is still doing well a few days later. Misha was outside teaching him to follow his PapaMisha through the grass. Indiana enjoyed pecking at the lawn and Misha enjoyed watching him. I am hoping that this really makes some headway into the mind of our little boy who has spent the bulk of his life practicing self-preservation and perfecting his charm in order to be as far at the top of the "pecking" order as possible. While we are glad to see that some of these behaviors have been modified, we know that he is just mostly obeying us and that real change will have to come from his heart. Hopefully, Indiana Jones will awaken that part of Misha and allow him to more fully experience his life.

Oh. And, to celebrate our new addition--Look what we had for dinner.
Mmmm....

Maybe the fact that we found this funny is partly why he still has compassion issues...
.......naaah. I doubt that.
:-)



Melissa

Playing....

Working hard

Homeschooling has been incredibly difficult this year. Not so much because of the number of kids but because of the difficulties that Max and Misha have had with various things. One is to be expected: I have had to sit with them through every paper in order to tell them what to do at each new section. They simply couldn't read well enough to move through the worksheets on their own. Even if they could, two part instructions or even simple prepositional phrases proved to be tricky English for my boys.

This gives me a good way to measure their progress, though. I have noticed more and more that Max especially will try and read his own directions and usually get the simple ones right! This is a big help to me.

Another major problem has been that new concepts, and occasionally well-known concepts, cause the boys to just plain shut down. They don't know how to do something so they visibly quit. They will sit and stare at me or at the paper not hearing or caring to learn anything. It is like talking to a wall. I can not tell you how frustrating this is when I have to sit with them and I KNOW that this behavior means my sitting there forever!

The good news is that we seem to finally be conquering this problem. I have done two things. One, this usually occurs in math so that when it happens (So-and-so doesn't know what 5+3 equals today and refuses to put any effort into figuring it out), I just calmly hand them their copy book. This is a book where they have written all the number facts and equivalents that we need to know at this point. 1+1=2, 1+2=3, etc... I send them off to read it aloud. This makes them very upset but it accomplishes some important things: It does not allow their behavior to control my time to excess, It helps to solidify the simple number facts in their minds, and it gives them incentive to avoid having to do this!

I think that I may be dealing with some prenatal alcohol exposure issues in some cases, but even there, the book reading helps because of the repetition. Also, it is an immediate but not overly stimulating consequence/result.

Another thing that I do is to state my intentions and to try and train their attitudes to be more positive. For instance, it makes more sense to them if I say, "Reading your book is not a punishment, it is to help you to learn these things that give you so much trouble! It is a good thing!" They buy that pretty well :-)

Also, I sometimes say what I think is obvious but that I notice does not occur to them. One instance of this is that I might say, "When you don't know how to do something, you can be glad because Mommy can help you to know it! Now you will know a new thing!!" I, at one point noticed that the shut-down that they do is a form of giving up and being defeated. It doesn't seem to occur to them to try.

Anyway, all that to say that I am seeing progress at last! Schoolwork has been quickly and happily done lately. That is HUGE!

Also, Walker, Texas Ranger is on tonight and they want to be sure and get to watch it!

English lesson gone awry

(Misha at a football game this past fall)

A couple months ago, I realized that Misha does not have the language skills the other two boys have acquired. Why did it take me so long to notice? Because he has a two-fold personality trait in that he is very expressive with his hands and body language and that is combined with the fact that he is good at reading others' body language and intent without necessarily understanding the words spoken. These two things masked the fact that he wasn't using words because he didn't know them! (he understands, for instance "vacuum" but might not be able to come up with the word on his own. He would say "Vrooomm" and act it out)

Anyway, I have started reminding him to "Use words" when he talks and have been asking him to repeat what I say to him sometimes to see if he listened to what I actually said (usually, I have to repeat myself). Steve has been stopping him every once in a while to quiz him with "What's that?" questions. Like the other day:

Steve: Misha, what is that? (Pointing at the light)

Misha: Light

Steve: And what is that around it?

Misha: I don't know

Steve: It's a fan... And this?

Misha: Bed

Steve: And what is that white part up there? (Pointing at the ceiling)

Misha: Seal. Steve: No, close--It's a ceiling.
And what is on the floor? (Pointing at the carpet)
Misha: Toys!

Yep. he got that right! Obviously I need to clean my room!

melissa

Snow in Tennessee!!

(All three boys coming after Mommy!
Uh Oh! Looks like Mommy got Misha! And, disregard the pink snow pants, please!
We live in TN where it snows twice a year so we wear whatever we have!)

Click the link for more pictures on our Family Blog at:

Life Here

Max

Max came running into the house breathlessly exclaiming, "Mama! For you!!"

He handed over a large, but spindly, blackened, and crumbly, twiggy-looking thing. I tried to figure out why it was for me...and then I noticed, there on the ends of the brittle stems were tiny dried flowers. The only ones around this time of year for a boy who wants to pick flowers for his Mama.

Thank you, Max; I love you too.
And now why is my sweet boy so excited? And why is he standing by the clock chanting "Teek, Tock, Teek, Tock, Teek, Tock...."? (apparently our clock has a Russian accent, who knew?)
Because it is almost 7:00pm.

Time to watch Walker, Texas Ranger:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tW1tIpE95kc

It's become a family event a couple of nights per week. The boys love it. We HAVE to get a video of them watching the big fight scene at the end. Oh how fun it is when the bad guys get it!!

More snow...New family photo!

The Freezing Eimers Family, January 20, 2007

We had more snow overnight to replace what we used up yesterday. It was too cold for snowman making but ok for sledding which was a fun thing to do. Poor Vitali felt that he didn't get enough sled time. I said to him, " Vitali! You don't look very happy."
"I am happy." he replied.
"OK, Then show me your happy face", I asked. This, aparently, was his happy face:

But he was just having a grumpy moment.
Now we can see his real happy face:
...as you can see, he got sled time too!

He and Ivy were snow buddies. I think they felt the pink-pants bond.

But we really did have a good time! Here are a couple more pictures I thought were cute and fun.
Melissa

To celebrate one year being home: Snow!

Today marks the one-year anniversary of us being home and the beginning of our family being together. This is the day that we count as our real homecoming.

Last year on January 19th, I had managed to hold back all the tears until I saw the girls running toward us in the airport. Many of our friends were there with signs reading Welcome Home! in Russian. What a relief it was to be home!

This January 19th, we got our first 'real' snow of the season. The kids were so excited and it seemed that the dryer was running all day drying sopping wet mittens and coats and pants. Somewhere in there we even managed to finish the basics of schoolwork. What a great way to celebrate--except for the schoolwork part.

Max loved the snow...
...He stayed out long after everyone else went shivering and dripping into the house.

This is Misha right before I said, "Misha! Get into the house and put on a WINTER coat!"

This is Vitali's Crazy Face. When we see this face, we know that we have about three seconds to redirect him before he throws something or hits someone. That boy has energy he doesn't know what to do with! Outside is the best place to have a Crazy Face.

Catching snow in cups. Two seconds later he threw them as far as he could:

One year ago today our lives were in total upheaval! Now we have settled into our new normal. We still count to six constantly when we go out but it somehow doesn't seem like such a big number...at least most of the time!

Leslie suggested in her comment last post that I should post something about how the boys have progressed. Where they were then compared to where they are now. The things they have learned as well as the things that they have still to work on. I think this is a great idea and I am glad she suggested it. If anyone else has suggestions, please let me know! I sometimes run short on ideas.

Well, I am off to join the family watching Walker, Texas Ranger. I will have to post video of that sometime! The boys, especially Misha, get so excited during the big fight scene at the end of every episode. It is pretty funny!

Melissa