How are things working out? How are the boys adjusting? Would you adopt again knowing what you know?
These are questions we are often asked regarding the adoption of our sons. The next statements are ones that we have heard several times.
We had friends who have adopted and it has been awful. IT is pretty clear it wasn’t God’s will for them to adopt!
There was a man who after becoming a Christian:
- Lost his position on the preeminent political body of the day
- Was jailed unjustly numerous times
- Was shipwrecked and bitten by a poisonous snake
- Was beaten, stoned, and tortured repeatedly; several times almost to death
- Finally lost his life when his head was cut off on the Apian Way outside of Rome
Was this man a failure? Could we infer based on all these consequences the man was outside of God’s will? Would that be a fair assessment?
Of course not! The man to whom I am referring to is St. Paul. The man who through the work of the Holy Spirit is most responsible for the spread of the Gospel of Jesus Christ!
Using the consequences of obedience to God's call as the metric of success or failure is completely unfair. By those standards every Apostle would have to be considered a failure and outside of the will of God. St. Peter was crucified upside down. St. James was stoned to death. St. John was banished and was the only Apostle not to suffer an early death.
Obedience to God’s will and commands has consequences! Adoption has consequences but so does not adopting.
The child not adopted will almost surely be sexually exploited. The child not adopted will face an almost certain untimely demise. The child not adopted will most likely never find the grace of adoption by the Heavenly Father.
I would be negligent if I didn’t acknowledge how hard adoption can be. I know many a family that has been broken or bankrupted trying to help a lost child find healing.
There will be consequences if you choose the adoption journey! The hurt child will find and expose every character flaw you have. However St. James made a simple statement care for the orphans. It was not qualified! It did not guarantee a smooth path!
So how can you know if it is God’s will for you to adopt? How does one know if they have been ‘called?’ Do you need to hear some mystical voice or see some sign?
If you are a follower of the adopted Christ than you have already been called to care for the orphan. The scriptures are clear about God’s love for little children. The example of adoption throughout the scriptures is clear. The case for Christians adopting lost children is self evident!
So should everybody adopt? Of course not! Maybe you are disqualified from adopting lost children because of a health, moral, legal, financial, or other issue. The fairer question regarding whether or not it is God’s will for you to adopt may be; Is it God’s will that I not adopt?